Gear Abby: Fear, Friskiness & Filthy Backpacks
- colin7931
- 12 minutes ago
- 42 min read
In the latest episode of Gear Abby, host Shawnté Salabert and producer Colin True celebrate double digits (episode 10) with a mix of trademark chaos, honesty, and hard-earned outdoor wisdom. From spooky trail stories to frisky trailhead advice, this installment swings (sometimes literally) between fear, therapy, and freedom.
Question 1: The Scariest Outdoor Moment
Listener Jess asks about Shawnté’s scariest outdoor experience. The real answer lives where confidence meets consequence; or when you misjudge a raging river.`
Lesson: anticipate, prepare, and keep humility handy.
Question 2: Hikers With Benefits
Hikers With Benefits wonders how to keep things… spicy… on trail (backcountry banging has finally made it on Gear Abby!). Shawnté delivers the pragmatic playbook: privacy, wipes, comfort, and a discreet trash bag.
Lesson: Don’t make other visitors unwilling extras in your outdoor fantasy.
Question 3: Winter Thru-Hiking & Freedom
Freedom (a.k.a. Braveheart) just quit their job and asks about winter thru-hiking. Gear Abby gives them some domestic and international options (see the footnotes below).
Lesson: Prepare for short daylight, cold-management systems, and plan B town stops.
Question 4: How to Clean a Backpack (Without Ruining It)
A listener asks for the right way to wash a muddy, funky pack. Shawnté’s step-by-step:
Empty & prep: Remove hipbelt, frame sheet, stays, straps, and all dirt/sand. Open zips/ports.
Spot first: Use a soft brush + mild soap (no detergents, no fabric softener) on straps, back panel, and salt-stained areas.
Tub wash: Lukewarm water + a small squeeze of gentle soap. Submerge and agitate by hand. Avoid machine agitators that can twist/break webbing.
Rinse well: Several clean-water rinses until no suds remain (soap residue degrades DWR and attracts dirt).
Dry right: Towel-blot, then air-dry shaded (never a dryer or direct sun). Hang upside down so pockets drain.
Reassemble & refresh DWR: Once dry, reinsert frame parts. If the face fabric once had DWR, apply a spray-on treatment to the exterior shell only.
Lesson: Keep your pack clean to reduce one source of off putting outdoor odors.
The Takeaway
From bursitis to banging, fear to freedom (and now funk-free backpacks) Episode 10 is classic Gear Abby: practical, irreverent, and unexpectedly wholesome. There are no dumb questions out there, only smarter, kinder, and kinkier ways to move through wild places (and keep your gear from smelling like a crypt).
Episode Bings (aka Footnotes)
For the youngs out there listening, this is Richard Dean Anderson.
We wanted to put a footnote here but it simply would have just been a porn link so you’re on your own with this one.
For those tracking at home that is the one millionth poop reference we’ve had here on Gear Abby. #facts #themoreyouknow
Hey Exped: Either you’re welcome or we’re sorry for this reference. If it’s the former, how about sponsoring Gear Abby as the official gear brand of backcountry sexual shenanigans?!
Thermarest: Same for you!
Rumpl: And you too!
Outdoor brands claim that they’re always innovating new products and yet the combo outdoor and sex toy accessories market continues to be woefully underserved.
Backbone Trail Details
Ozark Highlands Trail Details
Pinhoti Trail Details
This seems timely with Thanksgiving on the horizon.
Florida Trail Details
Te Araroa Trail Details
Fun fact: she didn’t.
Listen to the Full Episode
This recap only scratches the surface, listen to all of Gear Abby Episode 10 here or just click the player below.
If you’ve got your own gear dilemmas, want to safely discuss how you like to smell your outdoorsy underwear, or just want Shawnté to settle a debate, send your questions to deargearabby@gmail.com, they just might land in a future episode.
Episode Transcript
The Gear Abby Theme Song!
00:00:03.200 - 00:00:22.000
You got questions going out of your mind. Someone with answers.
Now that's hard to find, like the what and the why and the how stuff works or just where to go to avoid all the jerks she's Gear Abby. Gear Abby. Gear Abby. Advice that doesn't suck. Gear Abby.
Shawnté Salabert
00:00:22.000 - 00:01:35.960
Hello there, my outdoorsy friends, and welcome to Gear Abby, where we tackle the controversial, weird, obscure and taboo topics that other outdoor podcasts refuse to touch.
I'm Shawnté Salabert, an outdoor educator, writer, former school social worker, and president of the Yellow Bellied Marmot Fan Club who's hiked, run, climbed, paddled, and adventured across the United States and beyond.
And here on Gear Abbey, I channel all that experience and more into answering your burning questions about our relationships with outdoor people, products, places and pastimes. Because remember, my outdoor loving pals, marmots included, there are no dumb questions, just smart advice. You know how this works.
I know how this works. You're going to send questions to Dear gear abby mail.com and I shall sort through and pick my favorites, which as of now is pretty much all of them.
And I'm going to answer them here on the show. And as always, joining me today, we've got my partner in Gear, that's Pig. For those of you who maybe skipped ahead and missed the first episode, my.
My favorite Pig, the producer of Gear Abby, and a man who really helped solidify that this podcast deserves its E for explicit rating. Colin. True.
Colin True
00:01:37.000 - 00:01:39.800
10 episodes, double digits.
Shawnté Salabert
00:01:39.800 - 00:01:41.560
You keep showing up. I keep showing up.
Colin True
00:01:41.880 - 00:01:43.200
I know. Sorry.
Shawnté Salabert
00:01:43.200 - 00:01:50.120
No. Nobody's even paying. Like, I'm. This isn't my job. Although I feel like if I just didn't show up one day, we would both be sad about it.
Colin True
00:01:50.600 - 00:01:58.210
We would be. Although I was going to have to comment that it was 10 episodes and the Pig moniker hasn't stuck, but apparently it is going to continue to stick.
Shawnté Salabert
00:01:58.210 - 00:02:05.130
I mean, if I keep saying it will stick, I feel like all we need is one listener to write in. Dear Gear Abby and Pig.
Colin True
00:02:05.930 - 00:02:07.930
No, don't listen to Gear Abby.
Shawnté Salabert
00:02:07.930 - 00:02:10.490
No, that's the whole point of the podcast. Listen to Gear Abby.
Colin True
00:02:10.970 - 00:02:12.570
Well, about everything else but that.
Shawnté Salabert
00:02:12.970 - 00:02:50.370
Oh, my gosh, Colin. You know we were joking earlier, before we started recording the episode about how old we are.
And I have to tell you today, today I found out that I have bursitis in my knee. Oh. Adding that's not like an old thing. But I'm just adding to the litany of issues with my body. But I was.
I was worried that the PT was Going to be like, please stop doing all the things you love.
And luckily I got someone who A, is a little older than me and B, was like, oh, no, you must keep doing the things you love, otherwise your whole body is gonna break down. So I was like, yes, sir, I shall do whatever weird band exercise you tell me to do.
Colin True
00:02:50.370 - 00:02:57.140
In the spectrum of any ailments, is bursitis the one thing that is not an std? That sounds the most like an std.
Shawnté Salabert
00:02:57.860 - 00:02:59.260
It's. Yeah, it's. It's.
Colin True
00:02:59.260 - 00:03:00.140
It's kind of on that spectrum.
Shawnté Salabert
00:03:00.140 - 00:03:05.820
It is on the spectrum of. Is it an std? Is it the name of a medication? You don't know? I mean, it's hard to say.
Colin True
00:03:05.820 - 00:03:07.819
Oh, don't talk to her. She gave me bursitis.
Shawnté Salabert
00:03:07.819 - 00:03:37.030
It was real. It's real hot. It's. There's a lump now. Yeah. Painful to the touch, if you will. And I will. Actually, the PT did. I was like, ow, dude.
Yeah, it's funny because I was gonna tell you how, you know, last week we had our little convo with Killian Journey. And the funny thing is after I talked to Cillian, you know, we're chit chatting. I told. I was. I was up.
I know you, you've ripped on me for talking about the Sierra so much, but whatever, I love it, okay? I love it. Colin.
Colin True
00:03:37.590 - 00:03:39.910
I was channeling a listener when I sent you that email.
Shawnté Salabert
00:03:39.990 - 00:04:26.140
Colin sent me an email that was like, dear Gear Abby, stop talking about the Sierra so much. You know what, Colin, this is. I'm just digging from my experience. You know what, we're gonna get some other experiences in here. But, but so I.
So I'm telling Killian where I am. And he was like, it is so beautiful up there. I was like, yes, it is. And I said, I'm actually gonna go.
I think I'm gonna go on a run after we get off the phone. But I am not going to do any of the things you did in the mountains. Correct. And in fact that I realized I forgot my running shoes.
So I was all geared up. I was all the way up there. I was so stoked to do my first run in a while because of the bursitis.
I was gonna like test it out and forgot my running shoes. So I. I did have my switchback primal zen, which you introduced me to, which I love. So not for running with the primal.
Colin True
00:04:26.140 - 00:04:26.940
Zen or the switchback.
Shawnté Salabert
00:04:26.940 - 00:04:30.060
No, the primal. Sorry, the Lem's, the lemons. Primal zen.
Colin True
00:04:30.300 - 00:04:30.780
Okay.
Shawnté Salabert
00:04:30.780 - 00:05:26.890
Yeah. But so this. So I use them as Like a casual. Like a walking shoe. But I had those. And then I had. I got.
I have this purse that I got from Thacker, New York. They're this company that does, like, this really cool combo of outdoor stuff and. And, like, fashion.
You know, it feels very Japanese to me, but also very, um. So I had, like, a sling from them, the cloud sling. So I'm like, all right, we're gonna just go. I was trying to channel, like, less is more.
So I was like, all right, we're gonna go on a walk instead of a run. And honestly, like, I chucked a whole Nalgene into that purse. I had some snacks. Very important for me.
Um, I think it was nerds clusters, because that's what all the kids are eating. And honestly, I had such a nice. I went up to a couple lakes. Like, I didn't do anything hardcore. There was some very minimal scrambling involved, but.
But it was a weird feeling for me, somebody who is preaching the gospel of the 10 essentials, to just kind of go out there and be a little more free with it. I liked it. I don't know if I should be admitting this.
Colin True
00:05:28.090 - 00:05:44.090
I think you just lost some credibility points there, gear Abby. No, I think you're. I think that's right. That's the way it should be. I like going out. Like, I agree. I mean. Yes. Is it a little more risky?
I'm like, yeah, but nine times.
9.9 times out of 10, everything ends up working out just fine anyway, so to treat yourself to a little, like, lightweight adventure, I think that's a good thing.
Shawnté Salabert
00:05:46.520 - 00:05:54.600
All right, well, I'm feeling. I'm feeling pretty fresh today. Now that I've been physical therapy, my bursitis is in check. It's completely. I've completely healed. One session.
Colin True
00:05:54.600 - 00:05:56.120
Do you know who gave you the bursitis?
Shawnté Salabert
00:05:57.720 - 00:05:58.840
I think if we go back.
Colin True
00:05:58.840 - 00:05:59.520
The phone call.
Shawnté Salabert
00:05:59.520 - 00:06:27.460
Yeah, it. It may have been. I might have given it to myself. Very cyclical. I think it's my own fault. But you know what? The people are not here to hear about my.
My calamities in my life. Maybe they are. Honestly. I mean, what somebody asked me about biggest. They are invested. So stay tuned when.
When I go deeper into therapy and we get more into that. But for now, let's. Let's find out. What do you have for me? What's the first listener question?
Colin True
00:06:27.940 - 00:06:40.020
All right, here we go. Dear, dear Abby.
I was just listening to the episode where you said spooky season was your favorite time of year, so it made me wonder what's the scariest thing that's ever happened to you outside. Signed, Jess.
Shawnté Salabert
00:06:40.500 - 00:06:42.340
I guess we're getting personal again, Jess.
Colin True
00:06:43.080 - 00:06:45.640
Yeah, well, you know, a lot of scary things out there.
Shawnté Salabert
00:06:45.640 - 00:07:02.920
There are. There are really so many.
I used to do a lot of presentations for my PCT guidebook, and every single time, people would be like, what were you afraid of? And I could just give them a line list.
But maybe the scariest thing I've ever done was consider going on a trail run in the Sierra right after talking with Killian Jord. I mean.
Colin True
00:07:03.000 - 00:07:05.720
Or you felt like his judgment was just hanging over you the entire time.
Shawnté Salabert
00:07:05.720 - 00:07:39.540
No, I worried. I was like, will the power of Killian compel me? Like, will I suddenly be really good at this? Or. No. As it turns out, no.
I won't even remember running Sho. No, but this is. Jess, I really like this question. Feel free to ask me most things, maybe not anything, but y' all can send in personal questions.
I do have a lot of less than outdoorsy friends who assume that I must have nerves of steel because, you know, of all the things I do. But there are plenty of things that freak me out. And this is where I'm gonna say mom, if you're listening, earmuffs for the rest of the segment.
Colin True
00:07:40.020 - 00:07:40.620
Yeah, Gear.
Shawnté Salabert
00:07:40.620 - 00:07:41.340
Mom. Your mom.
Colin True
00:07:41.340 - 00:07:44.700
Go. Go do something else. Yeah, I think It's, I like, eight minutes.
Shawnté Salabert
00:07:44.700 - 00:07:58.040
Yeah, go watch some YouTube video organizing cupboards. It's like, one of your favorite things. All right.
I would say up and up until last summer, I would have actually said the scariest thing I've experienced outside was on the PCT when a mountain lion crossed my path.
Colin True
00:07:58.040 - 00:07:58.760
Yeah, that's right.
Shawnté Salabert
00:07:58.760 - 00:08:05.360
Like, that's. That's pretty far up there. And in hindsight, it's kind of cool. You're like, oh, hey, I got to see a mountain lion. But not, I think, probably scary.
Colin True
00:08:05.360 - 00:08:07.240
In hindsight, too, though, I would think, yeah.
Shawnté Salabert
00:08:07.240 - 00:08:13.440
I mean, I could tell it wasn't hungry because it just sauntered. It was, like, kind of saucily sauntering past, who's like, look at me.
Colin True
00:08:13.440 - 00:08:15.980
Like, could totally eat you right now.
Shawnté Salabert
00:08:15.980 - 00:08:24.260
If I wanted to. I am a powerful being, but I'm going to take my jaws elsewhere. You're not tasty enough is really what that was about. But that's fine.
Colin True
00:08:24.260 - 00:08:26.380
I'll let the bear that's coming up behind me do it.
Shawnté Salabert
00:08:26.620 - 00:10:20.230
Oh, no, Our bears are vegetarian. But anyway, well, so, okay, the thing that.
That took the top spot on my personal, you know, hierarchy of outdoor fears happened actually last summer, and it topped the mountain lion thing by like a mile. So I'm gonna take you back to 2023, which was two summers ago, and that was the year we had just an absolutely bonkers snowfall here in California.
And it really jacked up a lot of trail infrastructure. So you had avalanches in places that normally don't, you know, have avies.
We had bridges get knocked out, including one along the PCT JMT corridor that's like a pretty important bridge over the South Fork San Joaquin River. And that bridge got twisted on its side.
And if you were on the Internet, on any of the Facebook groups or Reddit groups that year for the PCT or the jmt, you would see that. I mean, it was piece mostly PCT hikers, because at this point, they're, you know, almost 900 miles in.
They have no fear, but they're like spider manning across this bridge that was completely twisted on its side. Um. Oh, my God. Yeah, not I. That year. I just skipped that section. But so. So this year or last summer, I was out there, and they still.
The bridge had been dismantled and taken. It was just laying in pieces on either side of the river. And I was in the Sierra pretty early, so it was like the beginning of July.
You still got snow runoff happening, but it was not. It was an average snow year. So nothing too crazy. I'd been, like, monitoring reports. Everything looked pretty good.
Just, I'd say, just a few days before getting to this spot. I finally felt like, all right, I think now is an okay time to cross. So I was with two other people. There was this woman, Token, who I'd met at.
That's her trail name.
I met her at vvr, and she was just doing a section, and she'd been thinking about this crossing since before even getting on trail because it was, you know, people got swept away this. That summer.
Colin True
00:10:20.230 - 00:10:20.630
Right.
Shawnté Salabert
00:10:20.710 - 00:10:25.950
Not good. And then I was with my friend MacGyver, my old PCT buddy, and I kind of felt.
Colin True
00:10:25.950 - 00:10:27.270
Not Richard Dean Anderson.
Shawnté Salabert
00:10:27.270 - 00:10:29.590
Sadly, no, because he probably could have made a bridge.
Colin True
00:10:29.830 - 00:10:33.990
Okay. Right. I mean, step up, MacGyver. Live up to your name.
Shawnté Salabert
00:10:34.070 - 00:10:37.630
Right. I should have stripped him of his title in that moment. Yeah, exactly.
Colin True
00:10:37.630 - 00:10:39.030
I assume also a trail name.
Shawnté Salabert
00:10:39.270 - 00:10:45.670
Yeah, that's true. Also a trail name. These people do have real human names. I just don't know if they want to be outed in my story.
Colin True
00:10:45.910 - 00:10:47.150
That's cooler to use trail.
Shawnté Salabert
00:10:47.150 - 00:10:54.110
Yeah. Thank you. It is, yeah. Should I just call myself Rustic for this segment? That's my. My trail name is Rustic, which is a Whole nother segment.
Colin True
00:10:54.110 - 00:10:55.230
That's not a very cool trail name.
Shawnté Salabert
00:10:55.950 - 00:10:58.150
What's your trail name, Colin? Pig.
Colin True
00:10:58.150 - 00:11:00.590
Is it Pig? It will be now.
Shawnté Salabert
00:11:02.670 - 00:11:25.460
Anyways, so I. I thought. I felt kind of responsible for these two. I was like, all right, we're all in it together. I told Token the night before.
I'm like, listen, I'll be there with you every step of the way. If it doesn't seem safe to cross, you know, we'll backtrack. It's fine. So we get there. Mom, you better earmuffs.
If you somehow snuck in and kept listening, this is the time to for sure dip out, because I don't want you mad at me when I see you at Christmas.
Colin True
00:11:26.180 - 00:11:27.740
Now, now. I wanted her to be listening.
Shawnté Salabert
00:11:27.740 - 00:11:29.700
Yeah. So, hiker, I've come around.
Colin True
00:11:29.700 - 00:11:31.099
No, dear mom, hang out.
Shawnté Salabert
00:11:31.099 - 00:13:53.870
Do not. I'm glad you don't have my mom's number. Do not text her. So, yeah, like I said, hikers had been swept away multiple times that summer.
Rangers had been posting notes like, please don't do this. And so there is a certain point where the flow is low enough. So we get up there.
I kind of, you know, pull out my insoles, my socks, put my shoes on, tuck everything in my pack, which was in, as it turns out, a very good idea. Like, you know, most things out of my fanny pack went in my pack. And the river had two channels, so I stepped into the first one.
I'm kind of talking to it. I'm like, let's do this. I'm really grateful to be crossing all safely. And it's, you know, it's hitting, like, not knee high.
That's my limit of what I'm comfortable with in an actual river. So I get to this channel in the middle. It's very calm.
I have the two of them come over, and I step into the second channel, and within, like, 10 seconds, I. The water was up to my thigh, then it was up to my crotch, then it was over my waist.
Now I am jamming my trekking poles into the ground, like, praying. And I am like, I am not a religious person, but I was praying in every kind of prayer I could think of just to make it across.
And I forgot that I told Toke I have these little pink lines on my trekking poles that mark knee height. And I told her, don't worry. It won't go above that. And she's like, as soon as I saw it go over, I thought we were done for. It's like, whoops, Sorry.
But, yeah, I eventually made it across. And then the issue was getting them across. I was completely freaked out. Right. You know, and to their credit, the two of them bonded together.
They're like, we're gonna do this together. I. I directed them upstream a bit. They got across.
And I think my favorite thing, that I will never, ever forget about this, besides all of us making it out alive. Token gets to the other side and she just turns around and points at the river. And as loud as she can scream, not today, Satan.
So, yeah, I would say that river crossing was the scariest thing I've ever done in the outdoors. And I would never, ever, ever do something like that again. Like, I've done tons of creek and river crossings, but it had rained.
It had, like, stormed for two days prior, so the water level was higher than it had been the last time I heard reports of people crossing it. So it was just a mixture of bad luck and, like, maybe a little bit of bad judgment.
But yeah, of course, a week after we crossed Colin, the Forest Service, or yeah, I think it was the forest service replaced the bridge.
Colin True
00:13:54.670 - 00:13:55.390
Oh, you're kidding.
Shawnté Salabert
00:13:55.390 - 00:13:57.870
Yeah, I was like, come on, man, seriously.
Colin True
00:13:58.110 - 00:14:04.110
Well, I just checked out some. Checked into it a little bit, and actually, you're wrong. It's. The mountain lion actually is the scariest thing.
Shawnté Salabert
00:14:04.270 - 00:14:05.750
But the mountain lion didn't do anything.
Colin True
00:14:05.750 - 00:14:09.480
Except for sultry outlines are scary. You know what they're going to do.
Shawnté Salabert
00:14:09.480 - 00:14:12.240
But you know what else is scary? Like 100 million.
Colin True
00:14:12.240 - 00:14:12.960
Almost drowning.
Shawnté Salabert
00:14:12.960 - 00:14:51.990
Almost drowning. Like 1,000 billion pounds cubit.
I don't even know how you measure what the flow rate is of a river, but all of that just pushing against your body parts. The fit, like, feeling the water pour into my shorts and into my. My fanny pack was wet for like two days after that. All my snacks got wet.
Well, you know what? Safety first. I think that there is, as I was mentioning in the intro, like, there's.
There's a time and place to kind of go a little lighter with everything, but I do think that it's a good idea to maybe mind our P's and Q's a little bit when mountain lions and rushing rivers and cliffs are involved.
Colin True
00:14:53.350 - 00:14:54.390
This is why we go out there.
Shawnté Salabert
00:14:54.470 - 00:14:55.790
This is why we, like, type.
Colin True
00:14:55.790 - 00:14:56.510
That's why we do it.
Shawnté Salabert
00:14:56.510 - 00:14:57.670
Type 17. Fun.
Colin True
00:14:58.230 - 00:14:58.790
Let's see.
Shawnté Salabert
00:14:58.790 - 00:15:02.950
I know there's only three types of fun, but we take it to the next level and then 15 beyond.
Colin True
00:15:03.430 - 00:15:05.110
Type 17 is the full Killian.
Shawnté Salabert
00:15:05.330 - 00:15:06.970
Okay, we're going full Killian here.
Colin True
00:15:06.970 - 00:15:07.810
Full Killian.
Shawnté Salabert
00:15:08.610 - 00:15:09.090
All right.
Colin True
00:15:09.090 - 00:15:11.890
To him, it's just the kill. It's just like Saturday afternoon.
Shawnté Salabert
00:15:12.050 - 00:15:33.170
The full killing. Yeah. That full Killian is something we cannot even. We.
We don't even have a framework, a paradigm that we can assign in our own lives for what a full Killian would be. Oh, man. All right, well, I. We could. We could riff on Killian forever. But I think the people are here to hear questions and answers. What you got next?
Colin True
00:15:34.090 - 00:15:35.930
Oh, and they're going to want to hear your answer to this question.
Shawnté Salabert
00:15:35.930 - 00:15:36.490
Okay.
Colin True
00:15:37.130 - 00:16:23.020
Dear Gear Abby, My partner and I have been day hiking for years. We usually do short hikes and really don't carry a lot of stuff. It's reminiscent of what things? Something you just said recently.
We talked about spicing up a hike and maybe enjoying a little extracurricular activities out in the woods. Besides some basics, getting far enough off trail. We aren't trying to make people watch. Bringing something to possibly clean up with.
And what other advice would you have?
Specifically thinking of possible light and creative product ideas to make sure it's as comfortable as possible for the folks involved without trying to bring a bed along. Signed hikers with benefits. Ladies and gentlemen, episode 10. It took all of you this long for this kind of question? I'm a little surprised.
Shawnté Salabert
00:16:23.020 - 00:16:32.990
Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I mean, listen, we've talked horny salmon. Who could forget that? Mating tarantulas. But, yeah, now we finally get to talk about frisky humans.
Colin True
00:16:34.350 - 00:16:34.990
It's been too long.
Shawnté Salabert
00:16:34.990 - 00:16:48.030
It's been far too long. 10 episodes. You're right, mom, if you have been defying me this entire time, just seriously, earmuffs, like, go do something else.
I think I got you a puzzle. At some point, maybe you could go do a puzzle, do some crafting.
Colin True
00:16:48.030 - 00:16:50.990
How dare you suggest your mother isn't frisky herself.
Shawnté Salabert
00:16:51.070 - 00:16:54.910
I don't want to call it. I don't. We are drawing a hard line on this podcast.
Colin True
00:16:55.310 - 00:16:57.790
This is kink shaming, and I won't have it on this podcast.
Shawnté Salabert
00:16:58.030 - 00:18:21.440
Damn it. Oh, my God. All right, mom, don't listen. So Benefits. You. You should listen. Everybody should listen. I am really glad that you mentioned.
We'll just start with this. That whole idea of being mindful of others and getting far enough off trail.
Because one of the most uncomfortable experiences I've ever had outside was me. I was backpacking on a very popular trail with easy access to a bunch of lakes.
So you get a lot of day hikers out there, a lot of people fishing, people out with their families, and I was maybe two and a half miles in, and I'M coming around this very long lake and there I discover a pair of people engaged in carnal pleasures in broad daylight. And not very quietly, I might add.
I don't think they realized they were in sight of like, completely fully inside of the main trail because they'd kind of gone behind this boulder situation. And I think they thought they'd be hidden.
But their little trail that they took to get there just basically curved right back to the main trail so you could see them as soon as you got around the rock. And there was a family not very far behind me. So I just kind of like made a, like a throat clearing sound.
Like an awkward, like, sex interrupting throat clearing sound. I was like, I'm sorry to interrupt you, but there's a bunch of kids coming up right behind me.
And all I heard after that was just this flurry of like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. And just clothing.
Colin True
00:18:21.440 - 00:18:26.720
Oh, they really thought that they were like, they had been so discreet. Like no one could know that. No one.
Shawnté Salabert
00:18:26.720 - 00:18:38.160
No one could hear us or find us or see us 100ft from the trail. Yeah, they weren't even far away. They were not even far away enough off the trail to take a poop. Like that's how close they were.
Colin True
00:18:38.400 - 00:18:55.840
All right, made it. How long are we in for the poop camp?
No, but what's, you know, the, the approaching sound as you're approaching them and the sounds of, you know, human lovemaking versus the guy coming at you with the speaker blaring some sort of like house music. Which, you know what's worse?
Shawnté Salabert
00:18:55.840 - 00:18:56.900
100% the speaker.
Colin True
00:18:57.930 - 00:19:02.370
Yeah, that's true. The people in the woods, you're like, well, this is at least going to be a good story.
Shawnté Salabert
00:19:02.370 - 00:20:45.290
Like, it is. It is a. You know, that's natural. There's not any amplified sounds at least coming out of it. Right. But if you have a speaker, God damn you.
It's truly one of my least favorite things in the known universe. That and leaf blowers. It's really exists on the same continuum. Yes. Oh, man. All right, so benefits. Choose your location wisely. Just this clear.
This has to obvious has to be said. Popular trails, fun front country campgrounds are not really the best locations to set up your personal den of iniquity.
You do want to be far enough off the beaten track. I mean, preferably, maybe your first time is on private land.
Like you get a little Airbnb camping glamping situation, but you just don't want to force other people to have to hear or see what you're getting up to out there. And I really don't think most people realize just how far sound travels outside, especially when there's like, you know, cliffs or rocks around.
They just amplify everything and. And tent walls are not made out of acoustic foam, as a tur turns out. So new. That goes for snoring as well, but that's why I bring earplugs.
On that note, not to be a killjoy, but one other little bit of housekeeping here.
In a lot of places, it's actually technically illegal to get busy outside due to, you know, all those laws against public indecency, indecent exposure, lewd conduct. So be discreet as possible also for that reason.
And if you're day hiking, this means that you're not just hiking far enough off trail to be truly alone. But maybe also wear some clothes that you don't have to fully take off to get to the good stuff.
Um, I, you know, this is like maybe a dress situation or a kilt situation or, you know, just something where you can sort of maneuver without being fully naked is probably one of the biggest things I would suggest.
Colin True
00:20:45.610 - 00:20:53.850
There's a lot of common sense built into gear. Abby's answer here, I just want to point out, like, I mean, if you need this explained to you, maybe just stick to the bedroom.
Shawnté Salabert
00:20:54.330 - 00:22:39.060
No.
Well, we're giving benefit the benefit of the doubt here, because I think the question is even about these basics, because they've already considered it. But I'm doing this for everybody else who's listening. Just gotcha, gotcha. I'm covering. I'm covering some ground here.
So this now we're going to start getting into. Start getting into the nitty gritty, which is comfort.
So I think a lot of people have fantasies that adult play in the outdoors is this opportunity to kind of feel your most free. But honestly, it's more of a literal and figurative pain in the ass.
Half the time you're trying to avoid sharp objects, trying to keep mother Nature away from your sensitive bit. Kneeling into sharp rocks, getting pine SAP stuck to your ass, swatting away a million mosquitoes, brushing against poison oak.
All of those things are going to be hardcore mood killers.
So consider this a vote for maybe bringing a tent or a shelter of some kind, especially as you're just sort of like exploring this side of your time outdoors.
And I would say even bring up, bring along like a little battery operated fan, if you've got one of those little clip fans, some airflow going in there, maybe leave the vents open. So you don't get condensation.
And even just to create a little, little vibe, get some of those fairy lights that you can string up and just really set the mood, you know what I'm saying? Like brown chicken brain cow. Even, even if you do opt out of a shelter, I'd bring along some sort of cushioning.
So using two standard sleeping pads is just not going to cut it because they're just going to squirrel all over the place.
You could consider something sort of double wide exped makes a megamat duo, which is just this, this big ass sleeping pad that you could either starfish on by yourself or engage in sweet, sweet love with your partner.
Colin True
00:22:39.940 - 00:22:49.140
There's so many double entendres in everything you're saying right now that I'm just shocked that you are not just like stopping and giggling at yourself as you're saying the, you know, cushion and pushing.
Shawnté Salabert
00:22:49.620 - 00:22:53.380
You know, someone was telling me the double wide.
Colin True
00:22:53.620 - 00:22:54.900
I mean, there's a million things.
Shawnté Salabert
00:22:55.060 - 00:23:18.850
There's so much. There's like a never ending supply of sex ex puns. But there. Somebody was telling me, somebody who listens. It's.
I don't know if it was an email or just somebody I knew commented, I can't remember, but they're like, how are you not just laughing your ass off the entire time you're doing this podcast? I'm like, you don't know the amount of times that I'm like silently laughing at something Colin says.
Or Colin is like his whole head goes out of frame because he's laughing too hard and he doesn't want to blow up the mic.
Colin True
00:23:18.850 - 00:23:19.890
There's a lot that gets cut.
Shawnté Salabert
00:23:19.890 - 00:23:23.830
There is the magic of editing. You do a very good job, sir.
Colin True
00:23:24.220 - 00:23:28.420
Thank you. It's mostly just us laughing. If you did a super cut of it, just be us giggling. That's all it would be.
Shawnté Salabert
00:23:28.420 - 00:23:35.260
That's going to be my year at year end gift to all of you is just a super cut of Colin and I chortling for like seven hours.
Colin True
00:23:36.140 - 00:23:37.380
Gear. ABBEY chortles.
Shawnté Salabert
00:23:37.380 - 00:26:05.020
Oh, man. But okay, still talking about cushion, you know, for the pushing you want to try.
You could also try yoga mats or, you know, closed cell foam mats, a picnic blanket. I know Eddie Bauer and L.L. bean both make picnic blankets that have waterproof sides which you may want.
You know, foam mattress topper, if that's what you got. Or if you're a climber, bring a crash pad.
You know, there's a lot of options out there, but you want something and into that thing, you know, Benefits. You also asked about potential quote, light and creative products.
So I would say first if you want go visit any adult shop, we'll kind of turn up a bunch of different options in this realm. You probably want to stay away from anything battery operated. That's kind of loud because.
Yeah, you know, I mean maybe if you've got, we know what you do, it's happening. But there's a lot of little, like little lightweight things that you could bring along if you want to add something.
But I really do think for your first times out there experimenting, keep it as simple as you can, you know. But bring stuff like some of your standard camping equipment can be great.
Bring a sit pad or two and that's extra comfort under hands, knees, elbows, butts, wherever you're moving your stuff. If there's, there's logs involved, ground, whatever rocks you want, some sort of cushioning and sit pads are so good for that.
You could also just cut up a closed cell foam like a cheap one you get from Dick's Sporting Goods or something. Camping pillows also provide great cushioning support and opportunities to arrange yourself at different angles.
And I would recommend staying away from the inflatables for this and thinking about something that's more of a stuffed pillow.
Personally I think the therm, a rest compressible pillow cinch they, they may not have thought about this use case scenario but it's a really firm like you can change the firmness on that pillow by cinching it tighter and tighter. And it's, it's a pretty good pillow to give you support even just if you're sleeping.
So you may want to consider it for, you know, frisky times a double sleeping bag or something like a rumple blanket so you guys can kind of cozy up.
And a bandana, so you're talking light and creative that bandana as long as you haven't already used it to like blow your nose into or wipe your sweat. Bandanas can do a lot for you a thousand different ways depending on your imagination and your partner's consent.
So a bandana might be a good entry quote toy to bring with you outside because it's something that could also be useful if you like sprained your arm and you know, so you can.
Colin True
00:26:05.020 - 00:26:07.620
So then you can say hey, I'm using my cock ring as a sling.
Shawnté Salabert
00:26:10.900 - 00:26:24.400
I'm sorry, this is not, I'm not apologizing. No, no, you don't have to cut that out. Colin, what did I say at beginning of this episode? Did I not say you single handedly?
Help us earn the E rating. I like that. You're really owning that today.
Colin True
00:26:24.400 - 00:26:29.760
Oh, you're wearing a sling. No, it's my cock ring. Thanks. Just right now I'm using it as a sling. Right.
Shawnté Salabert
00:26:29.840 - 00:26:33.520
I mean, we do talk about outdoor items having more than one use, so.
Colin True
00:26:33.920 - 00:26:34.560
That's right.
Shawnté Salabert
00:26:34.560 - 00:26:46.320
Get creative out there and finally prepare yourselves, all of the Americans who are listening, which I think is most of you, because I'm going to name a specific body part and I know as Americans we're very uncomfortable with this.
Colin True
00:26:46.740 - 00:26:47.260
Oh, no.
Shawnté Salabert
00:26:47.260 - 00:26:51.220
But benefits. And to anyone else who's listening, if there is a penis involved.
Colin True
00:26:51.780 - 00:26:53.460
Oh, no. Leave the room. Puritans.
Shawnté Salabert
00:26:53.460 - 00:27:25.670
Puritans go. Bye. Bye. Consider using a condom to keep things tidy. Trust me, you're gonna. It's. There's gonna be a lot happening here.
Try to keep cleanup as simple as possible. Bring some wipes, that bandana, when you're done with it, you know, can pull double duty camp towels. All of that stuff can be helpful afterwards.
And bring a little garbage bag of some sort, you know, to toss everything into afterwards. And this would be a great use case for a bidet, which we talked about in the last episode. Oh, my God.
All right, Colin, you know, I gotta mention it, listen, this is a prime opportunity for bidet use.
Colin True
00:27:26.070 - 00:27:27.270
No, it really, it really is.
Shawnté Salabert
00:27:27.270 - 00:28:05.340
You can kind of clean up a little bit afterwards or if you're really feeling fancy about it, bring one of those camping showers and have a little shower together afterwards quietly off trail. But my final, my final bit of advice benefit is the lightest of the light, and that is to stay light hearted about the whole thing.
Chances are it's not going to be this perfect movie magic experience that you're kind of fantasizing about. It's getting busy outside is much more likely to be awkward, at least at first, and just.
So just commit to good communication, enjoying the moment without expectation and probably laughing a lot.
Colin True
00:28:05.740 - 00:28:26.470
I feel like this is a, A better fantasy than an actual real thing. Right? This is a totally. If the moment hits like, holy, this is happening, go for it. But if you like to. To say like that there's something. These are.
I don't know, it's. A lot of it is the fantasy. It's like having sex in a pool or something like that. And then you do it. You're like, this is terrible.
Shawnté Salabert
00:28:26.550 - 00:28:27.110
Exactly.
Colin True
00:28:27.110 - 00:28:38.690
Like, so, so to. I think you gave amazing advice. And if you're truly into it, then this is great advice. But for the most part it's like.
Or wait till the night after tomorrow when you're back at the hotel and then, like, do it twice.
Shawnté Salabert
00:28:38.690 - 00:29:07.810
Yeah. Or use it as foreplay. I mean, honestly, like, share fantasies. I think it's very healthy for people to share fantasies with each other.
I don't think I've mentioned this before, but I did used to teach sex ed, so. And this was part of when I used to be a social worker.
But I think that it's really important to communicate with your partner and talk about the things you're interested in. And I think it's really healthy benefits that you and your partner are even considering this.
So even if it doesn't turn out to be this perfect thing, you're probably opening up your relationship to some new experiences, which I think is always positive.
Colin True
00:29:07.810 - 00:29:14.770
And maybe you get lucky and you find that couple in the woods that Shantae was talking about. And you never know where things can lead to in the backcountry.
Shawnté Salabert
00:29:17.490 - 00:31:15.160
We are so excited to welcome the official Gear Garage of Gear Abbey. That's Garage Grown Gear Garage Grown Gear, AKA ggg.
That is a lot of alliteration in two sentences is here to make sure all of Gear Abby's outdoorsy friends can get the newest outdoor stuff that they need for their next adventure. This week, it's an all food edition of the Gear Garage. We've got Embark Coffee Maple Energy Freeze dried cheddar cheese cubes by Foundation Outdoors.
That sounds very delightful to me as a Wisconsinite. And Summit Smolder powdered hot sauce by Wild Wildfire Spice Company. Oh, yeah, I'm ready.
I'm ready to make a tortilla, but also get real hype on some Coffee Maple Energy. So it's gonna be like a manic tortilla making. You know what? It doesn't matter if you're manic or chill.
Garage Grown Gear and Gear Abby are the perfect outdoor combo. So get shopping by heading over to garagegrowngear.com right now. Winter's unpredictably mild one week, freezing the next.
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You'll find something to suit the winter conditions you know are on the way for your neck of the woods. Get ready for winter and make cold optional by heading to fjallraven.com wow. Okay. So, Colin, do you want to ask me a mom friendly question now?
Colin True
00:31:15.480 - 00:31:17.800
Hey, look, I just read the questions. I don't send them in.
Shawnté Salabert
00:31:17.800 - 00:31:29.230
I know, it's true. I kind of loved when I saw that one come in. I was like, like, way to go benefits. I love that they were brave enough to ask that question.
So truly, thank you. That was. I'm glad. Listen, y' all truly send us any kind of questions. But. But how about.
Colin True
00:31:29.230 - 00:31:38.230
What would be the trifecta? Yeah, the trifecta for. For. For mom Abby here. You've had the biggest fears, you know, sex of the woods. What is the next thing that she.
That she doesn't want to hear about?
Shawnté Salabert
00:31:38.470 - 00:31:42.950
Probably 90% of what I do. So just. I just try to find the 10% here. Colin, what do you have?
Colin True
00:31:42.950 - 00:31:46.350
All right, here we go. Dear, dear Abby. I'm about to quit my job.
Shawnté Salabert
00:31:46.350 - 00:31:46.910
Hey, yo.
Colin True
00:31:46.910 - 00:31:47.510
Long story.
Shawnté Salabert
00:31:47.590 - 00:31:48.190
Long story.
Colin True
00:31:48.190 - 00:32:05.670
Okay. Thanks for telling us. And I don't necessarily need to start looking for another one right away. Okay.
I thought that it might be fun to do a through hike while I have time. Are there any that would be doable in the winter? Signed Freedom. I added the extent I said Braveheart.
Shawnté Salabert
00:32:05.670 - 00:32:06.669
Did you Braveheart? Right.
Colin True
00:32:06.669 - 00:32:08.110
I had to go full William Wallace.
Shawnté Salabert
00:32:09.150 - 00:32:12.430
Did that feel good? You didn't really get to shake your fist yet in this episode, so.
Colin True
00:32:12.430 - 00:32:15.150
I know, I know. We've got to find a cloud to shake my fist at.
Shawnté Salabert
00:32:15.310 - 00:34:58.360
Yeah. Freedom. Well, hey, I'm. Well, I don't. I was going to say I'm jealous. I'm not really jealous of you.
Well, maybe it sounds like you're choosing to leave your job, so. Okay, let's say good for you. And second, I got you. This is exciting to think about spending some time on trail, some extended time.
You know, I love that one of my. Actually, one of my favorite backpacking trips was a winter hike. It was the backbone trail in the Santa Monica Mountains.
My friend Liz and I covered something like 72 miles and 15,000ft of gain in maybe three days. We were beat afterwards, so that one's on the shorter side, but. And definitely, definitely not easy. But it was so peaceful out there.
You don't have nearly the number of people you have in the warmer months. And here in Southern California, everything is green in the winter.
You know, we have kind of an opposite situation that a lot of people do in this country. So. So it was a really nice time to be out and I, I would recommend that trail to anyone.
But the eastern terminus actually burnt in the Palisades fire at the beginning of this year, so it is off limits until the landscape recovers, which is. Is sadly probably going to take quite a bit. But in general for winter, through hikes, which are absolutely possible, you want to just focus on.
This is going to be once again common sense coming to the party. The southernmost states.
So of those, let's start in Arkansas, which features, believe it or not, one of my biggest bucket list hikes, and that is the Ozark Highlands Trail. And to be fair, I'm probably a little more interested in doing it in the fall when it's. It's.
There's more like fall color going on and you could do, you know, maybe slightly warmer temps, but it's absolutely hikable in the winter. The full trail isn't quite complete.
They have kind of this mega vision for it and it's going to connect to the Ozark Trail, but the original 165 mile section through the Boston Mountains has been completed since the late 80s and it is absolutely filthy with waterfalls. So you can go check out some waterfalls. Um, and if you like to bike. I think we've talked about this.
Maybe I don't know if we've talked about it on Gear Abbey yet, but. But that part of Arkansas is just amazing for, for mountain biking as well.
So if you're gonna have some extra time on your hands and you like to bike, bring your bike with you if you can store it somewhere safe and consider biking afterwards. Just two states over, we're gonna continue our journey through the southern U.S. we're gonna just keep going east.
The 350 mile Pinhoti Trail, whose name means turkey home in. I know, isn't that nice? It's a Muskogee. It's the Muskogee phrase for turkey home.
I'm just imagining like all of these little gobblers hanging out does. And if you've hiked this trail, can you just email me at dear Gear Abby at Gmail and tell me about the turkeys.
Colin True
00:34:58.360 - 00:35:00.720
Like, I feel like, are they just everywhere?
Shawnté Salabert
00:35:00.720 - 00:35:10.020
Are they everywhere? Is it, are they sleeping with you at night? Like, what's happening with the turkeys? Are there turkey parties? Are the turkeys getting busy?
Like, you know, we want to talk about that on this podcast.
Colin True
00:35:10.330 - 00:35:13.770
So I was gonna say they should listen to the previous answer if they're sleeping with you at night.
Shawnté Salabert
00:35:13.850 - 00:36:02.590
Yeah, yeah, that's true. Actually refer them to question number two of this episode.
But yeah, that trail is super cool cause it links Flag Mountain in Alabama with the Bent Makai Trail in Georgia. So you probably won't want to continue on that trail afterwards cuz it does get snowy and you're heading out into the Appalachian Trail from there.
So that's a good shoulder season, like you know, late winter into spring hike. And I promise we're gonna keep going east.
And that means if you want longer, like significantly longer and you do not mind sharing your route with giant toothy reptiles. Boy, do I have something for you. That is the Florida Trail. That's right. Does this sound exciting?
Just over a thousand miles of swampland, forest, beach and plenty of road walking and opportunities to run into Florida. Man. What more could you want?
Colin True
00:36:02.590 - 00:36:04.150
Oh, everywhere, everywhere.
Shawnté Salabert
00:36:04.150 - 00:36:04.750
Constant.
Colin True
00:36:04.750 - 00:36:05.510
You'll find them.
Shawnté Salabert
00:36:05.510 - 00:36:43.430
You'll find him. Maybe you could be part of a future Florida man headline. And it maybe for a good reason though you could also leave the US and if you're willing to.
The cool thing is, is that our winter is New Zealand summer. So it makes it. Winter is the time to hike the Te Arora Trail. And the name is from the Maori language and it translates kind of to long pathway.
And that's pretty spot on because the route covers just over 1800 miles through both the north and south islands, which is very exciting because I've traveled to both. I don't know. Colin, have you been to New Zealand? New Zealand?
Colin True
00:36:43.430 - 00:36:46.630
I'm not. No, it's. That's. That. That is like number one on the bucket list right now.
Shawnté Salabert
00:36:46.790 - 00:36:48.550
You're a hobbit lover. You got to get over there.
Colin True
00:36:48.790 - 00:36:49.710
I know. Seriously.
Shawnté Salabert
00:36:49.710 - 00:39:10.320
Oh man. Yeah, it's beautiful. I've been to both islands. I didn't get to do a ton of hiking because I was there for work stuff, but yeah, it's gorgeous.
Something I will say about the Tower of Aurora Trail is that while it's always good to research cultural and environmental guidelines, you know, anywhere you choose to hike, there are some pretty specific ones in place for this trail that you want to understand and really commit to before you set out. In order to best respect both the land and the Maori people and sort of, you know, their history as you'll be walking out there.
And this just to add on here, this is a little off topic from Freedom's initial question, but it's related through hiking. As much as I love it and you all know I do is a largely self serving pursuit.
So I mean we are the ones who benefit the most from these hikes, but that doesn't mean we have to be the only ones.
Honestly, something I wish more hikers did in general is go beyond just preparing for their own through hike on, you know, physically gear, whatever and learn a little bit about the places that you're going to be traveling through and do your best not to just passively respect but also actively contribute to the betterment of those places and the people who live there. So this is, this is just a tiny example, but every summer I pay what feels like a small ransom to Booze Allen Hamilton.
That is the company that runs rec, you know, recreation.gov, so a lot of people feel like when they pay those fees that money is going directly to whatever park. Only a small portion goes to the park, the rest of that reservation fee and that's usually the unrefundable part.
So even if you cancel Booz Allen, they're still getting your money. That doesn't make me feel great and so the money's not making back into those local communities.
So what I usually do is I'll donate equal or more to groups like, you know, for the Sierra, I would do indigenous women hike, Eastern Sierra Conservation Corps, things like that. I obviously go to local owned businesses while I'm there.
So instead of like frequenting a Starbucks, look at what local owned coffee shops there are, for instance.
There's a lot of ways to do this, but freedom, I'd say get out there this winter, hike your hike, let me live vicariously but also do your best to walk the walk with your values while you're out there and I promise you it'll deepen your experience and it's just good all around for everyone. Oh man. Honestly, like now I kind of wish I was going a long walk this winter.
Colin True
00:39:10.880 - 00:39:11.440
You can.
Shawnté Salabert
00:39:11.600 - 00:39:13.600
I can. According to you, I can do it anywhere.
Colin True
00:39:14.000 - 00:39:15.280
You can't. You should go.
Shawnté Salabert
00:39:15.760 - 00:39:38.620
No, I honestly, I think just bring your microphone. I will. I'll get some good hashtag content while I'm out there.
No, I think, I think my only adventure this winter is my annual journey into seasonal affective disorders. So. Well, before we get there, we have one final question for today. So we've, we've redeemed ourselves a little bit.
I think my mom is probably listening now and you know, she'll let, let me know how it's going.
Colin True
00:39:38.620 - 00:39:40.700
But spoiler, she never stopped.
Shawnté Salabert
00:39:40.860 - 00:39:45.020
Damn it. Is she texting you right now? Are you guys just texting each other?
Colin True
00:39:45.340 - 00:39:47.020
Hello? She's like, I'm listening.
Shawnté Salabert
00:39:47.020 - 00:39:50.980
She's like, yeah, keep it up, Colin. Give me more to talk to her about later.
Colin True
00:39:50.980 - 00:39:51.580
That's right.
Shawnté Salabert
00:39:52.540 - 00:39:54.460
All right, final question. Let's go.
Colin True
00:39:54.460 - 00:40:12.580
All right, here we go. Dear gear Abby, how do I treat and wash my packs correctly? Everything smaller usually just goes into the washing machine.
But how about the big back panels and shoulder straps of large size hiking packs? Should I be reapplying dwr? Should I iron a backpack? So many questions. Signed, Marcus.
Shawnté Salabert
00:40:12.740 - 00:40:28.220
All right, Marcus, I like this. This is just like a avalanche of questions. This is all. You're just sneaking in, like, seven extra questions into your one main question.
This is also, honestly, a very good reminder that I have not yet washed my backpack from this summer backpacking season. And it is.
Colin True
00:40:28.220 - 00:40:29.620
Are you supposed to, Dude.
Shawnté Salabert
00:40:29.860 - 00:40:57.530
Well, we're about to get into that. It's nasty. It's like every time. I sometimes use it when I'm weight training in the neighborhood.
My friend Marek over at rology has been doing this thing that he caught. Well, it's just called rucking, where you just wear a very specific little vesty thing and put weights in it and feel very strong.
It's a military thing, but I use my backpacking backpack because that's what I have, and I just load it up with stuff and I went to put it on, I think last week I was doing a walk and I'm like, oh, my God, what does that smell? Oh, it's my back.
Colin True
00:40:57.770 - 00:40:59.140
Oh, it's me.
Shawnté Salabert
00:40:59.140 - 00:43:12.800
It's me. I made that. That came out of my body. So good on you, Marcus, because you are clearly less of a dirtbag than I am. But I'm going to clean mine.
Maybe after we get done recording this. It is. It is, Colin and Marcus, actually a great idea to clean your packs at least once a year.
For me, I usually do it in late fall, so right about now, when I'm done with my, you know, bigger backpacking trips for the year. And it just. It helps remove not just dirt, but also that. That sweat that's built up grime, it helps your gear function better in general.
So this goes with just about any gear that you're using a lot, especially stuff that has, like, zippers, for instance, your tents. But first, a warning. Since you mentioned washing machines, like, you want to be really, really careful about tossing even those smaller packs in.
It's usually way better to just wash things by hand. And you're going to avoid damaging straps and your closures and really help any of those finishes.
If there is, say, a DWR finish baked into product, it's going to help it last a little longer. If you're not chucking it into these big machines with lots of heat and movement. But you, you can. All right, so we'll.
We'll cover that first, since you asked, you can.
If you want to, you know, flirt with danger, try tossing in, like fanny packs or small summit packs in, if only if the manufacturer does not recommend against it. So triple check that you've removed everything from the pack that you've taken off, anything that's detachable.
This goes for any of the washing things we're going to talk about up. So hip belts, if they detach, pull it off any other attachments, make sure you've emptied out everything completely. Kind of shake out.
I take mine outside, just shake it out like a rug to get all of the pine needles and dirt from the outside, the inside, like, out micro trash, all that stuff. You don't want that getting into your washing machine and clogging up the works.
And if you're fancy and you have one, you could use like a small handheld vacuum in there and really give it a good. You don't need to, though. Just shake it out. Out.
If you're going to try to throw this or any other kind of techie piece of gear, clothing, whatever, into the wash, it's not a bad idea to toss it inside one of those mesh lingerie bags here.
You could get it at the dollar store or something like that usually, but it just will help keep everything contained, just like it would with a bra or something like that.
Colin True
00:43:12.960 - 00:43:20.240
Also, if you're getting frisky in the woods, like we talked about earlier, maybe the backpack is your lingerie. Who knows? Maybe that's all you have on.
Shawnté Salabert
00:43:20.700 - 00:43:32.940
So brown chicken, brown cow, for sure. That is. You know, every year I think it's. Oh, what day is it? Is it June 21st? Is that hike naked day? I think it's June 21st every summer.
Colin True
00:43:32.940 - 00:43:35.740
That sounds right. Actually, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's like the first day of summer.
Shawnté Salabert
00:43:35.740 - 00:44:12.660
Yeah, it's the first day of summer. So June 21, it's unofficially or officially, through hiker circles, it's called Hike Naked Day. And, you know, I just.
Once again, people don't always want to see your business. So to all of the. It's always some leathery old guy walking around, like, swinging all over the place.
I've had experiences, not with them, but walking past them. You know what? I guess when you get older. They really do. You just really don't care anymore.
You're like, I'm letting my freak flag and everything else fly. But not in your washing machine. Okay.
Colin True
00:44:13.220 - 00:44:14.580
No, that could hurt.
Shawnté Salabert
00:44:14.580 - 00:45:34.430
Hurt. You don't want to hurt your pack or your business. This. Just treat it like it's your baby. Use a delicate soap, the gentlest of the cycles. Ex.
You know, I. I personally wouldn't do this, but you're. You're. This is my legal disclaimer. I'm not responsible for anything that happens to your. Okay. But I did so. So I did look up because I was curious.
I'm like, do. Are there people recommending you throw your stuff in the washing machine? No.
I looked up at the care recommendations from a bunch of different pack makers. Osprey, Gregory, Deuter, Fel, Raven Helly Hansen, and. And sorry, Marcus. They all want you to put some effort into it and just wash them by hand.
The process is not difficult, though. So you're going to prep your pack the same way. And then what you're going to do is get a.
If you've got a bathtub or just some other large basin, maybe one of those large metal garden tubs, whatever floats your boat or your pack. You're going to fill it with lukewarm water, very small amount of, like, the gentlest soap.
I prefer something unscented, something like a castile soap like Dr. Bronner's would be perfect. Use a sponge or a washcloth, not a bristly brush, to kind of work your way around the pack.
So you want to get into all those grubby little nooks and crannies. Gentle around the zippers, but get in there. And I usually use a little extra soap on the straps seam because my. My B.O. seems to be very aromatic. Wow.
Colin True
00:45:34.430 - 00:45:36.230
All right. Coming clean here on the bottom.
Shawnté Salabert
00:45:36.230 - 00:45:56.620
Listen, we're just. We're honest. And, you know, that's. That's. I am a stinky girl. I always have been. I'm a prolific sweater. I was at the.
When I was at the physical therapist this morning, he had me. I really thought it was just going to be like some gentle manipulation to figure out what's wrong with my knee.
He had to be, like, doing Bulgarian split squats with weights. I was like, damn it, I like this guy.
Colin True
00:45:56.620 - 00:45:57.140
All right.
Shawnté Salabert
00:45:58.100 - 00:47:45.280
But anyway, whether or not you are as stinky as I am, you want to, you know, once he suds everything up, rinse it really well. You don't want any of that soap left on there. Hang it up somewhere to dry. That is not in direct sun, if you can help it.
You want it to get the breeze, you want it to get some warmth. Warmth.
But you don't want it to be the sun can just like the washing machine or something, it gets really hot and you can mess up your coatings if there's, you know, DWR or whatnot on there. But yeah, that is the power of heat on things. So you just, just on plastic, plastic things, but also your pack. You just don't be gentle with it.
You want it to last. The whole point of this is taking care of your gear. And I'd say you can also. You asked about dwr. You can also do a technical wash.
So there's cleaners out there that are meant for gear. I use Nik Wax has like this great line of products and I use that on a lot of my different gear.
They've got a tent, it's called Tent and Gear Solar Wash. That's a spray on and it cleans and it adds in some UV protection, which is great for the longevity of your gear. You can also follow it up with the solar proof spray if you want to add another layer. And that helps restore some of the weatherproofing.
So some of the waterproofing, weatherproofing to the material. And how often you do all of this really depends on how often you use your pack. So I'm probably out backpacking longer than the average person.
So I just do this. Like I said at the end of the season, it's part of me cleaning all my gear.
But if you're a normal human being who only does a handful of trips a year, you could probably get away with restoring that weatherproofing like every few years. You don't need to be that meticulous about it.
But I will say if you need any more motivation, Marcus, I find it very satisfying, but also maybe a little disturbing to see just how disgusting the water is. When I finish washing my packs in the tub, it makes me feel like I really earned it out there. There's the results of my labors.
Colin True
00:47:45.440 - 00:47:50.639
Also, benefits are from earlier. Think about that when you're getting naked with other people.
Shawnté Salabert
00:47:51.120 - 00:48:04.160
That's how filthy you are, you filthy animals. All right, that's it for this episode of Gear Abbey. Until next time. Send your burning questions.
Hopefully not from your outdoor pursuits, if you know what I'm saying.
Colin True
00:48:04.320 - 00:48:05.680
Or from your bursitis.
Shawnté Salabert
00:48:06.160 - 00:48:56.340
It doesn't burn, it just hurts. Send your non burning. Send any questions. They don't have to be burning. They could just be a mild itch of a question.
Send those questions about your relationships with outdoor products, people, places and pastimes over to us@Dear Gear abbymail.com and I'll do my best to answer them. And probably laugh a lot with Color Colin. Or find somebody else who can.
And of course, head over to your podcast listening service of choice and subscribe, rate and review to support the Pod and personally make my day. And hey, follow us on Instagram at Gear Abby Pod. That is where it's all happening. If you want to see awkward reels, I'll be making them.
In the meantime, today's episode was produced by David Karstad and our very own Colin Shrew. Art direction provided by the talented Sarah Gensert. I'm Chante Salibair, and remember, there are no dumb questions, just smart advice.
